The biggest life lesson

Writing brings me in a contemplative mood, helps me to put a distance between my immediate activity and my thoughts about life in general. What was the biggest lesson I have learned that is worth sharing?

It seems the unpredictability of the future impressed me a lot. My generation – whether in the USSR or in the USA – just could not imagine the turns that brought us to the current state of affairs. We were taught and prepared ourselves to live in a world much different from what we have now, and there are still more changes in the pike. 

Another one—on the same level as the first lesson—is the main reason for the life unpredictability: the awesome power of (irrational) human desire. Some things can be built by generations and abandoned or even willfully destroyed on the spur of the moment if the circumstances (accidentally) aligned favorably. If something is strictly prohibited or does not make sense or even very dangerous but is very much desired, it probably will happen. Humans are rational most of the time and quite whimsical often enough to bring up serious doubts in human rationality.

Looking back I realize that I did quite a few unreasonable decisions too. But I never felt I should not have done it. The desire to do those things was too strong. It brought me great satisfaction by the sheer fact of me doing those things. Psychologists would probably say that I say so because I want to feel that my life was a success. Maybe. Even probably. So what? I feel it this way anyway.

Just one—quite innocent—example. If you drive along I-70 west through the Rockies, you may notice—not far from the Eisenhower Tunnel—a mountain that looks (from a certain angle) as a perfect pyramid. Several times I thought it would be fun to stay on the tip of it. And one day with my daughter together we climbed it (actually walked up, since it was not very steep).  It turned out that the top of the mountain was quite flat and not very well expressed. It looked like a pointed pyramid only from below, the flat part being hidden by the angled edge.

Yet, every time I drive by and see this mountain again I feel a wave of satisfaction. I’ve been there and “balanced” on the top. It is not quite rational, is it? But feels good. That’s what I am talking about. 

I am not advocating life without any rational planning. On the contrary, I think that we need to base our decision on rational considerations most of the time, and the successful execution of the well thought plans can bring a well-deserved solid feel of satisfaction. But we should not be frustrated that life turns out not the way we expected. In fact, we should expect that it will bring quite a few surprises. So, to offset such “failures” and to break the monotony of execution long-term plans we should not neglect the refreshing effect of yielding to our desires. Besides, once in a while, such deviation from the plans can turn our life to a completely unexpected but very happy path. 

That’s probably the biggest lesson I have learned from my life, so far.